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空因的博客  
已出版小说《Sun Grass》《Goobie & Dream-walker》和多本双语诗集  
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Whispering of Willows
   

Whispering of Willows

By Dr. (Anna) F. Zhao

 

 Unlike Western Medicine, Traditional Chinese Medicine is normally not divided into various disciplines. As a TCM doctor, I was trained to deal with any kind of illness, but I must admit that my favorite is still TCM ophthalmology.  Daniel, my clinical partner, remarked jokingly: whenever an eye patient walks into the clinic, your eyes immediately light up.

 Sure enough, even when I was still studying TCM, I had a strong feeling in my heart: I must focus on ophthalmology in the future. This must have something to do with growing up in a family with a history of severe glaucoma. My grandma was blind for most of her life, so is my elder brother.

 Just a few days before he passed away, my father was still lamenting: “how I wish I could donate one eye to your brother!” And in his will, he asked to donate his retinas to the hospital.

 I remember when I was still studying in the college, I used to spend hours everyday on transit. Whenever I encountered a vision impaired person with their white cane, I felt the urge to keep an eye on them, and if needed, give them a hand.  Sometimes I walked them to their next bus, or through the traffic lights. And sometimes I simply stood and watched them walk away, tears in my eyes.

 The same thing happened last Wednesday.

 Dr. Daniel Wang and I saw a man looking around with his white cane, seemingly lost, so I hurried over and asked: Do you need any help, Sir?

 He said he needed to find the elevator in the subway station. Briskly Daniel ran ahead to look for the elevator, and I walked with the man, holding his hand. Politely I asked him:  “ You can’t see at all, Sir?”

He shook his head and sighed, “I lost all vision in both eyes; doctors say I will only live in darkness for the rest of my life.”

 I gave him my business card and asked him to come and see me one day. But I knew in my heart that the chances of him coming to see me were very slim. The vast majority of people in the West, once labeled as hopeless by any authority, completely give up hope. This is when I feel the wrenching of my heart.

 Often I wondered: who gives us the right, especially as medical professionals, to cruelly turn off the flame of hope in people? Once that flame is extinguished, life becomes dark in an instant even for the sighted. Why do we put shackles of despair on the free minds of people? Since eons ago, it has been the will power and the hope of people that propels the world forward.

 Fortunately, there are still some people in this world who have not completely given up hope yet. That is why I still have some patients with severe eye diseases who come to see me.

 One person who was diagnosed with severe glaucoma has been under my care for a few years; little by little most of his symptoms have disappeared. He went back to see his ophthalmologist, but was told that his previous diagnosis must have been a mistake, because it is impossible to cure glaucoma. So, they provided a new diagnosis instead of investigating the alternative treatment he had been receiving.

 He wrote to some eye associations, asking them to refer clients and conduct more studies on my methods, and here is what they wrote back to him:

 “… Firstly, I am very happy to hear that you are experiencing a positive impact of treatment. I agree that there is a lot we can learn from traditional and alternative medicines and practitioners.

 At our Association, for us to endorse any treatment or provide education to our community about it – whether from a pharmaceutical company or alternative medicine – we require scientific evidence and peer-review. We often look to Health Canada, the Canadian Ophthalmological Society, and other expert bodies to validate treatment benefit and use. We look forward to learning more when the studies are published in peer reviewed journals…..”

 In other words, they want others to do the investigations.

 TCM believe that the liver opens into the eyes, and any obstruction of energy in the liver can lead to eye diseases. A deficiency in liver blood can lead to eye issues such as blurred vision, myopia and eye floaters. We also believe that stagnant energy in liver and kidneys is associated with poor vision. Hence, in order to improve vision and eye functions, our main focus is to improve and balance the energy in both liver and kidneys.

 This has been exactly what we have been doing. I use needles to improve the local circulation and remove stagnation. Herbal medicine and herbal drops are used to balance the internal organs. I use qigong to release anxiety and fear. Dr. Wang uses his unique massage to help with the flow of energy…. And it is working. Had the glaucoma patient believed what his ophthalmologists told him, he would have lost both his hope and sight. It is not false hope when it works.

 Recently another patient asked me: after coming to your clinic, my vision has been improving steadily.  I'm so glad I found you. Dr. Zhao, why aren't there more clinics and therapists like yours in the world?

 Why? I don’t know. We are simply doing our job, nothing extraordinary.

 If you come to see me and ask whether your eyes will be better, I will say: the first thing you need to do is to close your tired eyes and let hope seep into your heart.

 This is a poem I wrote years ago, to share with you, me, and all desperate patients in the world:

 

  
Patience
 
I repeat it again:
my dear friend
don’t despair
no matter what.

Even if you are a late-autumn date-tree,
deprived of your wealth,
your last leaf
wrested by merciless gusts,
your pure naive face,
disfigured by life’s knife.

Even if you have lost everything
you still have
much love, much hope.
They are not idle in the hidden world,
but have married, given birth to star-like sprouts.

Do nothing but give them time, 
patience, so their offspring
may solemnly step into the visible world
in tender green form.


 
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