青柳诊所手记39

2023年轻轻地从大雾中消失，2024年踩着大雪悄悄走过来。不知道世界上有几个人去年每一天都在工作，包括周六、周日以及所有的节假日？

大师兄就是其中一个。2023年的每一天，他都在诊所上班。除了在青柳，他也在另外一个诊所打工，所以很多时候，都是从上午九点到晚上九点上班，除了半个小时吃中饭的时间以外，其它时间他都在帮人治疗。

换了任何人，都会累得趴下了。他不但没有趴下，而且都很少皱眉头，似乎从来不知道什么叫做累。他也从来不去健身房，也不跑步也不做操。几十年茹素，不吃维他命不吃补品，从不担心蛋白质缺乏，也不忧虑营养不够。别人问他如何养生，他就笑一笑：工作的时候我就在养生。

我观察过他许多次。的确，他在给人推拿时，总是扎着马步，眼睛半睁半闭，动作不紧不慢抑扬顿挫。他的一举一动似乎是在练太极，又像是在跳舞，仿佛每一招每一式都是以意为主使，以气为牵引。

早晨太阳刚刚升起时，我们总是站在诊所的大玻璃窗前行注目礼，想象宇宙的疗愈之光照耀在诊所的每一个角落里。

“我给人推拿时，总是想象菩萨的光正通过我的手传送到我的病人身上，”大师兄说。

“这就是我服你的地方，“我由衷地赞叹。

圣诞前夜的最后一个病人，是一个满脸倦容的男人F，跟他说话时他都是爱理不理的。跟他同来的还有他16岁的儿子S。S大概刚刚上完音乐课，他的背上还背着一把小提琴。F用沉闷的语气说：其实我也想让我的儿子做点治疗，但是……

但是钱不够，我们猜这就是他想说却没有说出来的话。

大师兄给F推拿时，男孩就在那里玩手机。我看他有些无聊的样子，就说：S，你为什么不拉一拉你的乐器给我们听一听呢？

大男孩睁大了眼睛。在我的鼓励下，他把琴盖打开了。不一会儿，诊所里响起了悠扬的琴声。对于一个16岁的男孩来说，他实在已经拉得够好的了。我感动得眼睛都湿润了。我仿佛看到，S在拉琴时，大师兄和男孩的父亲也在专注地听着。外面是一片漆黑，所有的人都在庆祝圣诞。而在我们这个小小的诊所里，美丽的音乐在柔和的灯光中轻轻流荡。

男孩拉完后，我看着他把琴盖合上。我说：S，你拉琴时，我看得出来你的脖子有些僵硬，你的肩膀也有些痛，而且不止一天了。为什么你不让我给你治疗一下呢？

男孩再次瞪大了眼睛，但很顺从地让我按摩起他的肩膀和脖颈来。

他的父亲治疗完后，依然瓮声瓮气地说：多少钱？我的推拿加上我的儿子的？

我笑起来：“就付您自己的好了。您的儿子，他的琴声已经超额偿付了他的治疗费用。“

那个父亲的眼睛突然一亮。男孩年轻的脸上也绽开了笑容。

“这就是我服你的地方，“大师兄笑着赞叹。

今天终于有半天时间休息了，大师兄说：别人度假都去旅游，我也想去旅游一下。

我说：你要去哪里旅游呢？

我要去本拿比旅游，他笑答。

结果我们就在冰天雪地的天气里坐地铁去了本拿比。到了目的地，大师兄就直奔图书馆在那里疯狂找书，我就坐在玻璃窗前静静地读我的医疗笔记。这让我想起我在UBC读研究生时整日坐在图书馆里看书记笔记的情景。怎么一晃就是20多年了呢？真是岁月无痕啊！

回来的路上，我问大师兄他的旅行体验如何。“当然好极了，“他答，”人为什么要那么乐于从一个地方跑到另外一个地方去呢？真正的旅游，其实就是去你的灵魂里面走一走，看一看。“

这让我想起我从前写的一首小诗：

旅游

护照，机票，行李箱

开罗、巴黎、北京、莫斯科

去旅游，去旅游

全世界的人

被飞机、轮船和火车

从一个地方

搬到另一个地方

灵魂蹲在荒芜的山坡上

嘴里咬着一根干草

看着主人远去的背影苦笑 -

这个离我最近的人

一次也没来旅游过

Whispering of Willows 39

In the mist, the year 2023 slipped away, and 2024 stepped up quietly, trudging through the snow.

How many people worked every day last year, I wonder, including Saturdays, Sundays, and all holidays?

Dr. Daniel was one of them. Every day in 2023, he worked in a clinic, either in Whispering Willow or in another one. Most of the time, he worked from 9 am to 9 pm; except for half an hour lunch break; the rest of the time he was helping his patients.

Anyone else would likely have collapsed from exhaustion. But not him, in fact, he rarely frowned, as if the word tired does not exist in his dictionary.  Never does he go to the gym, or do any sort of exercise. A strict vegetarian he is, neither does he take any vitamins or supplements. However, he never seems to worry about lacking sufficient protein or anything about his nutrition. When people ask him how he maintains his health, he simply smiles: I maintain my health by working.

I have watched him many times. Indeed, when he was massaging, he would always stand with perfect posture, eyes half closed, every movement slow and rhythmic. One would say his movement looks like he is practicing Tai Chi or dancing, shifting his weight effortlessly from one side to the other as he performs various movements that flow smoothly from one to the next.

When the sun is rising in the morning, we often stand in front of the large glass window of our clinic and salute the sunrise, visualizing the healing light from the cosmos pouring to every corner of our clinic and ourselves.

"When I massage, I always imagine that the light of the Bodhisattva is being transmitted to my patient through my hands," Dr. Daniel said.

“This is what is so amazing about you,” I smiled.

Our last patient on Christmas Eve was F, a man with a weary face.  With him was his 16-year-old son S. S had probably just finished his music class, as he had a violin on his back. “I wish my son would also get some treatment, but...” F said in a dull tone.

But the money is not enough, we could imagine what was unfinished in his sentence.

While Dr. Daniel was giving F a massage, the boy was fiddling with his cell phone. Realizing he may be bored, I said: S, why don't you play a tune or two for us?

The boy's eyes widened. With my encouragement, he opened his violin cover. After a while, the melodious sound of the instrument resonated in the clinic. For a 16-year-old, he was pretty good at it. Moved, my eyes became moist. I could almost see that both Dr. Daniel and S were listening attentively during the treatment. It was already dark outside, everyone was celebrating Christmas, and in our small clinic, a cheerful melody was gently flowing in the soft light.

After the boy finished playing, I watched him put his stuff away, I suggested again: “S, when you were playing your violin, I could see that your neck was a little stiff and your shoulders seemed sore, why don't you give me a chance to treat you?”

The boy's eyes widened again, so he complied and allowed me to massage his shoulders and neck.

After his father finished being treated, he was ready to pay, still in his grouchy tone: “How much did it cost? My massage plus my son's?”

I laughed: "Please just pay for your own treatment. As for your son, his music has paid more than his share."

The father's eyes instantly lit up. A smile grew on the boy's young face.

“This is what is so amazing about you,” Dr. Daniel smiled.

Finally, we had half of a day off today. Dr. Daniel protested: “Everyone travels during holidays, so I also want to travel!”

“Where would you like to go?” asked I.

“I’d like to travel to Burnaby,” smiled he.

We ended up taking the Skytrain to Burnaby in the freezing cold weather. When we arrived at our destination, Dr. Daniel darted to his favorite library where he searched frantically for the books he had longed to read. In front of the glass window I sat, quietly flipping through my notes. This scene reminded me of when I was a graduate student at UBC, slouching in a corner of the library, toiling through the books, and jotting down notes for my presentations. In a blink, more than 20 years had vanished; how time is like a river, flowing away stealthily!

On the way back, I asked Dr. Daniel about his travel experience. "Of course, it was awesome," he replied, "Why are people so crazy about running from one far away place to another? I believe that real travel is to take a ramble in one’s soul and have a rest in it."

His reply reminded me of a little poem I wrote a while ago:

Travel
Passport, ticket, luggage
Cairo, Paris, Beijing, Mexico
travel, travel
all around the world

people are on the road -
carried by aircraft, ships and trains

from one place to another.

Soul squats on a barren hillside

chewing on a straw
with a wry smile, watching him leave -
he who is closest to me
has never paid a visit.