Why one wants to have at least one love?-Xiexie-萬維博客-萬維讀者網（電腦版）

網絡日誌正文

		Why one wants to have at least one love?	2010-06-19 12:24:04

Is it interesting experience? When you feel love someone, and you have to find some else available as candidate for secure. Is that illness? Many people like it, it is human surrender to its feelings.

Poeple can suvive from disaster but can't suvive in lost a love. Is it hopeless to think about it for mankind.

When I have a very nice talk with him. That's the night really for a family, he must make a phone call to someone. When we have a nice weeked mood, he must go to the library. when I feel the time is longer then I expected, the truth there is many young women sit around.

How about me, I have to be strong swimmer waiting to save myself without dragging the savers.


			文章評論

作者：2centsworth

留言時間：2010-06-19 19:48:03

Sorry, the second sentence in my comment should have read:

Your writing comes across a little like my Chinese.


	回復 \| 0 評論前需要先登錄或者註冊哦發表

作者：2centsworth

留言時間：2010-06-19 19:44:34

I commend you for making the effort in writing your blogs in English.
Your writing comes across is a little like my Chinese.

It is good start, my quibble is with the writing style. It is awkward.

Try something like this for the beginning of your essay:

Why everyone needs at least ONE love. (Or better, Everyone needs to have loved at least once.)

As for the rest of the article, I think you'll need to read more English writing to develop a better phraseology. For example: a more correct way of saying paragraph 2 would be "People can survive a disaster but not the loss of love." However I am not sure what you mean by the next sentence.

Keep at it; don't give up. I'm sure you'll get better in time.


	回復 \| 0 評論前需要先登錄或者註冊哦發表