“爸爸，”儿子止住笑说，“假如陌生人是一位外国人，那可怎么办呢？”
“外国人？”
“对啊。假如有一位外国人走过来问我，说：‘Hi Kid, who is that guy over there? That weirdo, as you can see from here, is wearing something stupid on his neck. Why is he drawing so much attention and respect from the crowd? Is he a famous clown or what?’ 那我该怎样回答他呢？”
父亲犹豫片刻，说：“你呀，假装没听清或听懂他说的话，对他说：‘Say that again.’ 外国人就会重复一遍他刚才说过的话。然后你再大一点儿声说：‘Say that again！’那老外就又重复一遍。然后你更大声说：‘Say that again！！！’老外不明故里就又重复一遍。这个时候，还没等他把话说完，你就啪！ 啪！ 啪！。 。。 啪！ 啪！ 啪！”
“爸，你啥意思啊？”
“啥意思？扇他大耳光子呗。啪！啪！啪！叫你不认识我围脖男！啪！啪！啪！叫你不认识我围脖男！。。 。”
“爸爸，至于嘛，人家是老外啊。而且人家是问我不是问你呀。”
“Just kidding.”父亲回过神儿来说，“问你？呃。。。有简单的和复杂的两种回答方式。简单的，就是假如你懒得理他，你就说：‘Excuse me, sir. Can you speak Chinese? I don’t understand a single word you‘ve just said, ‘cause I don’t speak any English. ’”
儿子听了，咯咯咯地笑了起来，说：“成。那复杂的呢？”
“复杂的，就是在回答他时，要对他同时进行批评教育。你不妨这样回答他：‘Sir, you seem to be an educated and intelligent man, but how come that you don’t recognize this gentleman, one of our most popular individuals in the nation, one of our most talented singers, Comrade Wei, Wei BoNan to be exact? What a shame! You better think before you say something stupid, or you might get somebody offended and get yourself into trouble. 。。。Hey, next time if you want to go to another country for a visit, you better do some homework before you go, all right?”
儿子笑得更欢了。父亲也抿不住嘴得意地笑了。
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