You should not generalise based on your impression on a few British expatriates. With Japanese, yes, you could generalise from what you see from one Japanese because all Japanese are just like made from one mould. To a much lesser degree, you could generalise about us Chinese. However, you already know that in UK and US, people are encouraged to develop their own personalities. You see a wide spectrum of people. No single mould can be used to characterise all Americans, nor British.
The same apply to companies. You see, within the same country and in the same industrial sector, the culture of different companies could be very different.
In terms of playing politics, we Chinese play the most of politics than any other nationalities.
My experience has made me a multi-cultural person. In UK, I am no different from another British. In China, I am just another Chinese. I am at home in both cultures. Having said the above, I could say the following:
In general, the Europeans as well as the northern Americans view the process and the end result with nearly equal importance. The process is important to the western people. This is an aspect we Chinese must learn from the western culture, particularly our people in the mainland. We Chinese tend to weight the end result too much and do not care much about the process.
To me, on the majority or even most of the things in life and work, the process is more important than the end results. Let me give you two examples. The first, in Olympic Games, 重要的是参与, 输赢是次要的. The 2nd, on getting rich, the process of getting rich is far more important than being rich in the end. You see, in Europe and US, those self-made rich men are very much respected by the society, because they did it through a process by themselves with their ability and talent. Those inherited a fortune would not get respect from anybody.
My impression from the expatriates from UK play a lot of politics. They talk a lot and do not delivery. They are care more about the process than about getting thing done. Are your colleagues in UK different?
Friend, you have left a valuable comment here. Discussion on this subject may benefit both of us and perhaps all readers at large.
Part of my answer to your comment has already been written in another article – “我 - 自画像”. However, I did not elaborate much on those points because of limits on my available time and on length of an article (not to be too long). Since you have asked this question, I could expand more to some extent by sharing my views and experiences with you and others on aspects of my life which I am not happy with.
I am a perfectionist. To a perfectionist, few things in life could be considered perfect. A lot of unhappiness in my life largely arises from this characteristic of mine.
I am struggling to name a few aspects in my life which I would consider perfect. I would say that the only aspect that is perfect to me in my life is my two kids – my daughter (the elder one) and my son. They are perfect kids. I could not possibly ask for more. They are beautiful 花一样的孩子们, intelligent 聪明, and cut伶俐. My daughter is extremely beautiful, intelligent and charming. A short time ago, an Englishman remarked to my wife after seeing my daughter “She has got extreme natural beauty!”. We have heard many such comments quite often from a lot of people, Chinese, native British and others. My son is very sporty, being good at every sporting activity he does, football, tennis, golf, running and jumping, etc. I did not realise how good he is at sports until last year when I started taking him and some of his friends out to play tennis and golf. Comparing his sporting skills with those of his peers, the gap is huge. He behaves like a professional in sports! He started playing football in the football club in our area from the age of 6 and has been representing our club in his age group in the last 5 years in one of the West London Youth Football Leagues – Harrow Youth Football League. He has been the best player in his position in the whole league ever since. At his age, his ambition is to play for Arsenal. He is also extremely talented in mathematics. Last July when I returned home for holiday near the end of the school year, I attended a parents’ evening to discuss his progress at school with his teacher after reading his school report. He was in Year 4 but his mathematics level had reached that of Year 6 !. I thought it was a mistake in the report and asked his teacher. I got this reply “I teach him English and his mathematics has been taught by another teacher. I also thought it was a mistake when I was given his mathematics grade and specifically checked with his math teacher. It’s not a mistake. He did it with ease.”
Now I turn to the things I am not happy about in my life.
Firstly, the disparity between my IQ and my EQ. My IQ has always been amongst the top few throughout my student life in China and UK and throughout my professional life. My IQ rarely disappoints me but my EQ often lets me down. I have been working for THE best consulting firm in my profession in the world in the last 10+ years with the best professionals in my field. Compared with them, my IQ aspects, such as brain power, problem solving skills, creativity, technical skills and capabilities, depth and spectrum of knowledge and expertise are the best in the firm, recognised throughout the firm. The firm wanted me to work everywhere – one year already in HK, already the head office wanted me to return, with New York office and Houston office wanted me to work there. However, compared with my peers in this firm, my EQ is just about average. EQ means the following characteristics in my opinion: interpersonal skills, negotiation skills, the ability to lead and to influence and to persuade others, the ability to construct convincing arguments and articulate them with a sense of humour, the capabilities to manage people and projects, the ability to delegate, to manage and to lead an organisation, to shape up an organisation etc. To put it short, by EQ I mean the characteristics of a person which enables him/her to be the CEO of an organisation such as HP, McKinsey, Goldman Sachs etc. On this account, I am just average among my peers in my firm. Hence, I could never become the CEO of my firm, not even a regional head or even the leader of a group !
In Europe and Northern America, the EQ issue is a common problem among our 1st generation immigrants from China. We have been trained, particularly in the PhD, to work alone. We tend to do very well when working in isolation. However, putting us in a team, in an organisation, we often got lost. Hence, there is the “glass ceiling” which is hard for us to break. We came from a different culture background and our educational system does not train our EQ. This is an aspect on which most of us Chinese from the mainland must work hard to improve in order rise up the ranks in a large multinational organisation.
The 2nd aspect in my life I am not happy about is my perfectionist character. People in the English speaking countries are not perfectionists. That is why you do not see any good products made in the English speaking countries. Rather, people in the English speaking countries tend to be good bullshiters. They are too ready to lower down their standards but I often find it too difficult to lower down the standards of my work. As I have written in my other article, perfectionist often under-achieve in their career, while those so-so chaps often rise to the top. On this account, I found that I am not quite suited in an English-speaking country. Rather, I could have done much better in a perfectionist country/culture such as Germany, Japan or Sweden where good products are made. But again, these latter countries are not as open as the English speaking countries in which immigrants can do well. Besides, language is a big problem, having spent too much time learning and improving my English.
The 3rd aspect I am not happy about is the constant struggle within myself between emotion and ration. I am an emotional person, in Chinese 性情中人. I often get too emotional, although not personal, in cases where I should deal with situations with a sense of humour. On this account, my colleagues and my bosses do much better than me. I am improving as time goes by on controlling myself emotionally. This also happens in my personal and family life.
Hope you and other readers can benefit from the above. Please feel free to response and discuss. This kind of communication is good for all.
You are doing great in terms of money, career, confidence and with a big ego!!! Would you like to share with us what you are not happy about in your life?... Unless you can characterize your life as perfect...
Welcome to my blog. Your impression is wrong and you are wrong to accuse me like what you have done.
I am a very confident person and I have a big ego. Sucessfulwise, few first generation immigrant from mainland China have achieve what I have. Like I wrote in a response to another comment:
I have no need to convince either myself or any readers how sucessful or unsucessful I am. Furthermore, I do things my way and I do not care much how others would view the things I do or view myself as a person.
The articles posted here were written primarily for myself as a record of my true feelings at the time of writing them. Since I cannot attract people to come here to read them, I only treat it as a bonus if I have the opportunity to share them with others. Some of the articles posted here are about me, where I came from, where I am now, where I am heading, who are the people dear to me in my life etc. Readers could share my experience and get encouraged. A lot people could do better than me and I will be happy for them.
I am extremely happy with what I have achieved in my career, in what I have done in serving China, in building my family, raising my kids, in my loving relationship with my wife and kids, etc. I get great satisfaction from these things, not my car, not my house, and not the figures in my bank account.
Truely, I started literally from pennyless in my pockets when I arrive in England many year ago. A lot of people could and should do better than me.
Please read all the articles here, including my responses to comments left here.
You truely have achieved a lot. But please have some self-confidence and have some peace in your own mind. Somehow, I am under the impression that you are trying to impress others, including readers of your blog. While you are convincing others about how great you are, it seems that you are trying to convince youself that you are very successful. We all live our lives under different circumstances. We all struggle through live, regardless of who we are and what we have done.
Enjoy your life and stop measure yourself from external measures!
welcome back and thank you for your comments again !
Your comments are certainly right on the point. I have fully discussed my two-sided personality in the article "我 - 自画象". Please take a look if you have not yet done so.
Indeed, I have constantly struggling within myself between the two-sided personality, a struggle between the mind and the heart I often told myself.
I certainly have my loving and caring side as well as the demanding and pushing side. These are talked about in the two articles "不是同胞, 胜似同胞 - 我的小妹Lisa" 和"骨肉亲情 需共同生活", in addition to this article.
BTW, I am also a loving and caring husband and dad. I will write some other articles later on on this subject and post them here.
