美国人的情与爱1:请不要死乞白捏的爱

最痛苦的爱情不过于你爱一个不爱你的人，更不堪的是他（她）还爱着别人！我们唯一能做的就是承认在这个世界上，情感是不受个人意志控制的，不能强求的！我们必须面对这个现实。

我们要倾听自己内在的声音——我值得被爱，要记住：不管你怎么努力，有些人永远不可能爱上你。

伤痛总有一天会消失，同时你的心会打开一扇窗户给真心爱你的人，他（她）爱你远远大过你的前任，给你梦想的一切情义。

但是首先我们要放弃对你等待的那个人的任何祈望：他（她）永远不会爱你如你所愿，不会在某一天醒来时领悟到她他一直爱着你，不会，假的。

放弃希望是很难的，但是对我们继续人生很重要。

我们无权抱怨别人伤害你的感情，因为是你纵容的；我们无权抱怨别人虐待你，因为是你往他她身边跑；我们无权抱怨浪费了时间，因为你老在他们身边打圈圈。

（原文是英文，楚女看了很喜欢，翻译了一下和大家分享，其实友谊也是同理。）

链接：·我成了第一位往返阿拉斯加冰川的女船长（亚洲）

Stop chasing and begging for love

Loving someone who doesn’t love us back, or even worse, someone who loves someone else, is the most painful thing in the world. But the most important thing we can do for ourselves is accept that certain things are beyond our control and take responsibility for the things that are.

We need to listen to that inner voice that tells us we deserve to be loved. And we need to accept that some people will never love us, no matter what we do.

The grief and the pain will eventually pass. And this will open the door for us to find someone else who will truly love us and give us everything we wanted with our ex.

But first we have to give up hope. It will never be the way we want it to be. That person you’re waiting on won’t wake up one day and realize they loved you all along.

Giving up hope is the hardest part of moving on, but it’s the most important.

We can’t complain about someone hurting our feelings if we keep letting them. We can’t complain about someone mistreating us if we keep coming back. And we can’t complain about wasted time if we keep walking in circles.