2006-03-28

\"I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of Dust.\"

Again, it is a story about betrayal between men and women. Brenda had
been married to Tony for seven years, with a lovely son. They lived
in a county close to London. This quiet and peaceful life was not perfect
for Brenda though. She liked parties, dancing, flirting with young men,
and being the center of eyeballs, which were all missing from the country
life. The visit of John Beaver from London, a totally loser, with no job,
no friends, no money, who was liked by nobody except his mother, started
the turmoil of Brenda and Tony’s life. Brenda seduced John. She rented a
flat in London so she could stay with John and told Tony that she could
not come back to their country house because she wanted to take some
economics courses in London. As always, the husband, Tony, a man with
true love and trust, was the last person to know the affair of his wife
with John. Their son died accidentally and Brenda told Tony she wanted a
divorce. Only by then, Tony realized that he had lost his wife. Nevertheless,
he still had hope and longing deep inside his heart that Brenda only
made a mistake and would come back to him after she realized how stupid
she was to leave him for John Beaver. Only when Brenda asked for tons of money
and accused him of various misbehaviors for the purpose of divorce, which
were not true at all, Tony realized how heartless and ruthless Brenda was.
He refused to give Brenda a divorce and stopped affording her expenses. Soon
Brenda fell into economic difficulties and John Beaver left her. So far it
seems that Brenda was punished for her betrayal and ruthlessness.

The second part of the book is too much of a surprise. Tony decided to
leave his hometown for a while so that he would not be bothered by the
acquaintances. It is inconsistent with his personality to me that he
chose to go together with an explorer. He went to Amazon forests, looking
for a missing city. The trip was not only unpleasant, but also dangerous.
His partner lost his life in the forest, while Tony was caught by continuous
fever. Although he was rescued by some Indian from the fever, he was forced
to read Dickenson for the Indian for the remaining of his life. The news
about his “death” came to London. Brenda was married to another rich
young man, who was one of Tony’s best friends.

Tony is the only victim of Brenda’s affair. Love often makes people blind.
Especially those who love deeper in the relationship, want to believe that
those who they love so much will love back equivalently. It is probably
human nature. However, there are men and women, like Brenda, who only want
to take advantages of others’ love. They make love a dangerous trap for
those with true love and trust. It is not worthwhile to sacrifice ourselves
for such relationship. Being hurt is not all bad if it helps you see through
the illusion.