［亲子之间］Top 10 Tips for Parents
1. 当孩子有话和你说或者有东西要给你看时，立即停下你手中的工作，把注意力放到孩子身上。与孩子作这样的经常的，尽管比较短的交流，一起欣赏或者作共同爱好的东西或事情是非常重要的。（When your child wants to show you something, stop what you are doing and pay attention to your child. It is important to spend frequent, small amounts of time with your child doing things that you both enjoy.）
2. 给孩子大量的身体的接触和抚爱。孩子需要大量的你的拥抱，需要与你依偎，需要和你手牵手。与孩子交谈，谈他喜欢的东西，也与他分享你一天工作中的各种经验。（Give your child lots of physical affection—children often like hugs, cuddles, and holding hands。 Talk to your child about things he/she is interested in and share aspects of your day with your child.）
3. 当孩子把事情作的很好时，给孩子大量 具体的赞扬。告诉她：“谢谢你这么快就按照我提的要求把事情做好了！“ （Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would like to see more of, e.g., “Thank you for doing what I asked straight away”.）
4. 孩子在无所事事的时候容易作坏事。所以尽量给孩子提供进行室内和户外的活动的条件和材料，比如玩橡皮泥，涂色采的颜料和图片，硬纸板盒子，换装装扮的服装，杂物房等等。（ Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child, e.g., playdough, colouring in, cardboard boxes, dress ups, cubby houses, etc.）
5. 自己以身作则，带头学习新技能，给孩子机会也学习这些新技能。比如在家里夫妻说话时语气温和文雅，再要求孩子说话要有礼貌，比如使用“请” 和“谢谢”的礼貌用语。孩子作出的努力要给予认可和赞扬。（Teach your child new skills by first showing the skill yourself, then giving your child opportunities to learn the new skill. For example, speak politely to each other in the home. Then prompt your child to speak politely (e.g., say “please” or “thank you”), and praise your child for their efforts.）
6. 为孩子设置明确的行为准则。与孩子坐下，进行家庭讨论，让孩子弄明白规章制度，以及不遵守时有什么后果。（Set clear limits on your child’s behavior. Sit down and have a family discussion on the rules in the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if they break the rules.）
7. 如果孩子犯错，父母要保持平静；要给孩子明确的指令，要他停止错误行为，并告诉他你期望他怎么作，比如：“停止打架，在一起玩要友好。” 如果孩子听从劝告，要给他称赞。如果不听从，就要让他承担适当的后果。（If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them a clear instruction to stop misbehaving and tell them what you would like them to do instead (e.g., “Stop fighting; play nicely with each other.” Praise your child if they do. If they do not stop, follow through with an appropriate consequence.）
8. 对孩子保持现实的期望。所有的孩子都会有淘气的时候，为孩子不听话而进行纪律约束并为之伤脑筋是为人父母的经历中不可避免的。（Have realistic expectations. All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline hassles. ）
9. 企图作十全十美的父母肯定会让你沮丧失望的。（ Trying to be the perfect parent can set you up for frustration and disappointment.）
10. 好好善待自己。如果你成天处于紧张焦虑和抑郁中，那么你很难担任一个平和宽松的家长。每一周尽量找时间让自己放松，或者作一件令自己愉悦的事情。（Look after yourself. It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed, anxious, or depressed. Try to find time every week to let yourself unwind or do something that you enjoy.）
（根据桑德斯的“积极育儿”翻译）Prepared by Professor Matt Sanders, founder of the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, and colleagues at the University of Queensland. For further information emailparentinfo@triplep.net or visit our website
相关链接：Positive Feelings About Race, Ethnicity Tied to Stronger Development in Minority Youth
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