STEPHEN: MR.PRESIDENT, GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN, SIR.
史蒂芬：总统先生，很高兴又见到你了。
OBAMA: STEPHEN …
奥巴马：史蒂芬…
STEPHEN: ALWAYS THE BEST.
史蒂芬：顶级的。
OBAMA: HOW DO YOU GET IN HERE?
奥巴马：你是怎么进这里来的？
STEPHEN: OH, JUST – YOU KNOW, I’M ALWAYS – INTERESTED IN TALKING TO THE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD. LOOK, I AM SO THRILLED TO JOIN YOU HERE AT CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY AND THE STUDENTS OUT THERE TAKE PART IN THE WHITE HOUSE FRONTIERS CONFERENCE. YOU TOO WILL SOON BE LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB. ISN’T THAT INTERESTING?
STEPHEN: AND I AM HONORED THAT YOU ASKED ME HERE TO HELP.
史蒂芬：很荣幸你求我给你帮忙。
OBAMA: STEPHEN, I DIDN’T ASK YOU HERE FOR HELP. I STILL DON’T KNOW HOW YOU GOT IN HERE.
奥巴马：史蒂芬，我没有求你帮忙。我还是弄不清，你到底是怎么进到这里的？
STEPHEN: IT’S OKAY TO BE NERVOUS, ALL RIGHT? WHY DON’T YOU HAVE A SEAT?
史蒂芬：你那么紧张是可以理解的。你坐下来好不好。
OBAMA: I’M ALREADY SEATING.
奥巴马：我坐着呢。
STEPHEN: GOOD.
史蒂芬：那就好。
OBAMA: HUH…
奥巴马：呵…
STEPHEN: SEE IT’S STARTING OFF VERY WELL ALREADY, AND I THINK MAYBE WE SHOULD START WITH A PRACTICE INTERVIEW AND I’VE GOT JUST THE MAN WHO CAN HELP. EXCUSE ME JUST FOR A SECOND.
STEPHEN: ALL RIGHT. THIS IS GOING TO GO VERY WELL.
史蒂芬：很好，一切都会很顺利。
OBAMA: ARE YOU …
奥巴马：你是 …
STEPHEN: OKAY.
史蒂芬：好了。
OBAMA: ARE YOU INTENDING TO HELP ME SHARPEN MY SKILLS WHEN I GO IN FOR AN INTERVIEW? IS THAT YOUR INTENTION HERE?
奥巴马：你是打算帮我改进我应付招聘应试的能力。这是你来这里的目的？
STEPHEN: IT’S WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING.
史蒂芬：我是吃这碗饭的。
OBAMA: OKAY.
奥巴马：明白了。
STEPHEN: WE’RE HERE TO FIND OUT WHAT YOU’RE GONNA DO FOR A LIVING, OKAY?
史蒂芬：我们要找出你将来怎样讨生活的路，好吗？
OBAMA: OKAY, LET’S TRY IT OUT.
奥巴马：好，那我们就试试。
STEPHEN: 55, TOUGH TIME TO START OVER FOR A MAN. OKAY. I HAVE A COPY OF YOUR RESUME HERE. WHY DON’T YOU HAND IT TO ME AS IF YOU WERE APPLYING FOR A JOB? GO AHEAD AND DO IT.
STEPHEN: CAN YOU TELL ME ABOUT SOME OF YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS? AND KEEP IN MIND IT’S IMPORTANT TO DESCRIBE THEM IN SUCH A WAY THAT IT HIGHLIGHTS HOW YOUR EXPERIENCE MIGHT BE RELEVANT TO A POTENTIAL EMPLOYER.
史蒂芬：你能告诉我你都有那些业绩？记住了，讲述时把亮点放在与将来工作有关的经验上。
OBAMA: OKAY, WELL I BROKERED INTERNATIONAL DEALS THAT SLOWED THE IMPACT OF CLIMATE CHANGE AND PREVENTED IRAN FROM ACQUIRING A NUCLEAR WEAPON.
奥巴马：好，我主导了减轻气候暖化对世界的危害和防止伊朗拥有核武的协议。
SETPHEN: OKAY, LET’S CHANGE THAT TO “PROFICIENT IN MICROSOFT EXCEL,” ANYTHING ELSE?
史蒂芬：好的，我们把它改成你有熟练操作微软EXCEL的能力。
OBAMA: WELL, I REOPENED RELATIONS WITH CUBA FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 50 YEARS.
奥巴马：50年来第一次，我又开通了和古巴的关系。
STEPHEN: I’D CALL THAT ONE “CONVERSATIONAL SPANISH,” SI?
史蒂芬：我把它归为精通西班牙口语。
OBAMA: OKAY.
奥巴马：中。
STEPHEN: IT SAYS HERE – LET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS RIGHT. IT SAYS HERE YOU SAVED THE AMERICAN AUTO INDUSTRY.
史蒂芬：这里说，让我搞准了，简历上说你救了美国的汽车工业。
OBAMA: YEAH, BUT NOBODY BELIEVES IT. CHANGE THAT TO “DRIVES STICK.”
奥巴马：是呀，但是没人信。把它改成我能开手动车好了。
STEPHEN: OH, THAT’S GOOD, THAT’S GOOD. IN CASE YOU WANT TO BE A LONG HAUL TRUCKER. OKAY. IT ALSO SAYS HERE YOU – YOU HELPED TENS OF MILLIONS OF AMERICAN WITH THEIR HEALTHCARE.
史蒂芬：啊，很好。或许你想当大卡车司机。这里还说你帮千万美国人拿到了医疗保险。
OBAMA: YOU BET.
奥巴马：当然。
STEPHEN: OKAY, LET’S TEST THAT OUT. IT HURTS WHEN I DO THIS?
史蒂芬：那好，考考你。（史蒂芬做摇胳膊的动作）我这样做会感到疼。
OBAMA: DON’T DO THAT.
奥巴马：不要做那样的动作。
STEPHEN: OKAY. GOOD. UH, DO YOU HAVE ANY AWARDS OR COMMENDATIONS?
史蒂芬：好，你得到过任何奖励和嘉奖吗？
OBAMA: WELL, I HAVE ALMOST 30 HONORARY DEGREES AND I – I DID GET THE NOBEL PEACE PRICE.
奥巴马：我有大约30个荣誉学位。我还得了诺贝尔和平奖。
STEPHEN: OH, REALLY? WHAT WAS THAT FOR?
史蒂芬：是吗？你做什么了得到的诺贝尔和平奖？
OBAMA: TO BE HONEST, I STILL DON’T KNOW.
奥巴马：说实话，到现在我还不知道。
STEPHEN: OKAY, GOOD. ALL RIGHT AND HAVE YOU EVER HAD TO FIRE ANYONE?
史蒂芬：好，你是否曾毙（炒过别人的鱿鱼）过人？
OBAMA: NO, I USUALLY LET SEAL TEAM SIX HANDLE THAT.
奥巴马：我一般都是让第六海豹队去做。
STEPHEN: OKAY, OUT SOURCING. OKAY, GOOD; NOW, SOCIAL MEDIA, VERY HOT. DO YOU HAVE ANY EXPERIENCE WITH THAT? LIKE TWITTER?
史蒂芬：啊哈，外包。好，行。社交网络现在是热门。你有参加的经验，譬如，TWITTER？
OBAMA: WELL, I HAVE 77 MILLION FOLLOWERS. DOES THAT COUNT?
奥巴马：啊，我有七千七百万粉丝，算吗？
STEPHEN: THAT’S VERY IMPRESSIVE. HOW DO YOU GET SO MANY?
史蒂芬：好厉害，你是如何拥有那么多粉丝的？
OBAMA: EXECUTIVE ORDER.
奥巴马：政令。
STEPHEN: REALLY?
史蒂芬：真的吗？
OBAMA: AND PHOTOS OF CATS.
奥巴马：还有那些猫的照片。
STEPHEN: OH, SMART. NOW, THESE DAYS EVERY BUSINESS WANTS TO APPEAL TO THE MILLENNIALS. YOU KNOW WHAT MILLENNIALS ARE.
史蒂芬：英明。还有，现如今所有行业都重视招引00后。你知道什么是00后吗？
OBAMA: I THINK SO.
奥巴马：我想我知道。
STEPHEN: OKAY. HOW DO YOU PLAN TO GET THEIR ATTENTION?
史蒂芬：那好，你如何引起他们的注意？
OBAMA: WELL, I TELL THEM STRAIGHT UP THAT THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT ELECTION OF THEIR LIFETIMES, THAT THEY HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE HISTORY. AND THAT THE RESULTS IN NOVEMBER COULD CHANGE THEIR LIVES FOREVER SO THEY HAVE TO GET OUT THERE AND VOTE.
STEPHEN: I’M SORRY I DIDN’T CATCH ALL OF THAT. DID YOU KNOW THERE’S A SNAPCHAT FILTER THAT GIVES YOU A FLOWER CROWN?
史蒂芬：（假装没听，玩他的手机）对不起，我没听你说什么。你知道吗，在手机上你可以给人套上花冠？
OBAMA: OF COURSE I KNOW THAT, STEPHEN.
奥巴马：我当然知道。
STEPHEN: OKAY. LET’S BE HONEST WITH OUTSELVES, OKAY? WHAT WOULD YOU SAY YOUR BIGGEST WEAKNESS IS?
史蒂芬：好了，让我们都诚实一些。说说你最大的毛病。
OBAMA: WELL, SOMETIMES – WHEN I TALS – I TAKE – TOO MANY PAUSES.
奥巴马：（不时不断停顿地说）有时，我讲话时，中间有太多的停顿。
STEPHEN: OKAY. IN THREE WORDS OR LESS WHAT’S A COMMON CRITICISM YOU HAVE FOR OTHERS IN THE WORKPLACE?
史蒂芬：好，用三个字，表达你对同事常有的不满。
OBAMA: I CANNOT STAND IT WHEN PEOPLE REDUCE COMPLEX IDEAS TO SOME SIMPLISTIC CATCH PHRASE.
奥巴马：我无法忍受当人们用过分简单的词汇来表达十分复杂的问题。
STEPHEN: WE CAN’T ACCEPT THAT ANSWER.
史蒂芬：我们不能接受这个答案。
OBAMA: YES WE CAN.
奥巴马：当然能。（这正是奥巴马竞选时用的简单的词汇，口号）
STEPHEN: OKAY. LET’S SEE, ALMOST DONE. DO YOU HAVE A BUSY SCHEDULE? AM I KEEPING YOU FROM SOMETHING?
史蒂芬：好，马上就完了。你很忙吗？我是不是缠住你而误了你的事。
OBAMA: YOU ARE.
奥巴马：是的，你耽误了我。
STEPHEN: OKAY. IS THERE ANYONE WE CAN TALK TO FOR A CHARACTER REFERENCE?
史蒂芬：好，有没有人可以为你提供佐证？
OBAMA: I KNOW SEVERAL TURKEYS THAT OWE ME A FAVOR.
奥巴马：我知道有几只火鸡欠我的好处。（注：几年来，感恩节时奥巴马免杀了几只火鸡）
STEPHEN: ALL RIGHT. GOOD TO KNOW; AND HOW DO YOU LIKE TO SPEND YOUR TIME? DO YOU HAVE ANY HOBBIES?
史蒂芬：好，了解了。你是怎么消磨时间的？你有业余爱好吗？
OBAMA: YOU KNOW WHAT I REALLY LOVE DOING? IS ENCOURAGING THE YOUTH OF AMERICA TO GET OUT AND VOTE THIS NOVEMBER SO THAT THE GOOD WORK THAT WE’VE DONE OVER THE PAST EIGHT YEARS CAN CONTINUE ON INTO THE FUTURE.
STEPHEN: ALL RIGHT. AND – NOW SIR, BECAUSE WE ARE ON A NETWORK TELEVISION SHOW, I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO ENDORSE A CANDIDATE RIGHT NOW. BUT I DO – I WOULD LIKE TO ASK YOU ABOUT YOUR CHOICE OF SNACKS. COULD I DO THAT?
STEPHEN: ALL RIGHT. I HAVE TWO CHOICES FOR YOU HERE. WOULD YOU CARE FOR AN EXTRA FIBER NUTRIENT BAR, WHICH HAS TRAVELED TO MORE THAN ONE HUNDRED COUNTRIES, OR THIS SHRIVELED TANGERINE COVERED IN GOLDER RETRIEVER HAIR, FILLED WITH BILE THAT I WOULDN’T LEAVE ALONE WITH THE WOMAN I LOVE?
OBAMA: WELL, I THINK I’LL GO WITH THE FIBER NUTRIENT BAR.
奥巴马：我想我选那个有营养和大量纤维的饼条。
STEPHEN: INTERESTING. OKAY. SO, ULTIMATELY, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE?
史蒂芬：有意思。那好，你最终想要什么？
OBAME: DONE WITH THIS INTERVIEW.
奥巴马：结束这个采访。
STEPHEN: OKAY, GREAT. BEFORE WE WRAP UP ANY QUESTIONS FOR ME?
史蒂芬：结束前有问题要问我吗？
OBAMA: I’M STILL WONDERING HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?
奥巴马：我还是弄不清你是怎么进来的。
STEPHEN: THAT’S AN EXCELLENT QUESTION. WE LIKE THAT, INQUISITIVE， OKAY, FANTASTIC. WELL, THAT ALL CHECKS OUT, MR. PRESIDENT. WE WOULD LIKE TO OFFER A POSITION. BUT FIRST WE HAVE TO HAVE THE MANDATORY COMPANY PHYSICAL. IF YOU’LL JUST – RELAX AND PUT ON THAT GOWN OVER THERE WE WILL GET GOING.
