盧岩回憶錄的目錄 Catalog of Layan’s Memoirs：1 娃娃婚約 Children Marrige Contract；2 啟蒙Revelation；3 肉眼通 Flesh Eye Through；4 少青年 Youngster；5 遼寧分院 Liaoning Branch；6 和平房產局 SYHP Housekeeping Bureau；7 東北大學 Northeastern University；8 死不瞑目 Death with Eyes Open；9 青中年 Middle Age；10 宿命通 Fate Through；11 生命之樹 Tree of Life；12 禪 Meditation；13 苦諦 Bitter Crux；14 集諦 Aggregate Crux；15 滅諦 Salvation Crux；16 道諦 Path Crux；17 金剛經釋 Philosopher-Stone Sutra；18 太陽石 The Sun Stone

1 娃娃婚約 Children Marriage Contract

我叫盧岩，1970年4月，出生在遼寧省，黑山縣，青苔萢村。爸爸是附近一家制磚廠的電器技術員。媽媽是位農民。

My name is Luyan, I was born in April 1970, in the village of Qingtaipao, Heishan County, Liaoning Province, China. My father was an electrical technician in a nearby brick factory. Mom was a farmer.

1971年9月的一天，家裡來了個客人，爸爸稱呼他為瀋陽老劉大哥（注1）。爸爸對媽媽說: “劉團長會相面，我想讓他給盧岩看看相。” 媽媽對此很不耐煩。爸爸又說：“劉團長不是外人，你得熱情點兒！他說，‘不能讓盧岩看見他，要不然就不靈了’。” 爸媽出了臥室。他們仨在廚房裡小聲說話。劉團長問我的生辰八字。

One day in September 1971, A guest came to our home, whom my father called Old Brother Liu from Shenyang (Annotation 1). Dad said to mom: “Troupe Leader Liu knows physiognomy; I want him to have a look our Luyan." Mom was impatient. Dad added: "Troupe Leader Liu is not an outsider, you should be more enthusiastic! he said, ‘He should not have Luyan seen him, otherwise it won't work'.” Mom and Dad went out of the bedroom. The three of them were whispering in the kitchen. Troupe Leader Liu asked me about my birth date.

注1-1，此時，他是東北軍區文工團的副團長，約40歲，師級軍官；本書通稱他為劉團長。本故事前後，我都聽不見劉團長的聲音。他說文言文；我是從爸爸給媽媽的解釋中，聽見他們在做什麼的。

Annotation 1-1, at this time, he was the deputy chief of the Northeast Military Region's Cultural Troupe, about 40 years old, a division officer; he is commonly referred to in this book as Troupe Leader Liu. Before and after this story, I couldn't hear his voice. He spoke in ancient Han; I heard what they were doing from my father's explanation to my mother.

(2)

劉團長說他要看看我，把廚房和臥室之間的門帘弄皺了。我沒看見他。爸爸給媽媽解釋他說的話：“他坐着的那個恣勢，通天鼻，是個和尚命，沒婚姻命。”

Troupe Leader Liu said he wanted to see me and wrinkled the curtain between the kitchen and the bedroom. I didn't see him. Dad explained to mom what he said, "That wantonness he's sitting on, the high beam nose, is a monk's fate, no marriage life."

“沒婚姻命是啥意思？他一輩子不能結婚？” 媽媽問。

爸爸詢問過劉團長後，又給媽媽解釋：“也可能結婚，但是婚姻不幸福或者不長久。”

"What does that mean, no marriage? He can't get married for the rest of his life?" Mom asked.

After dad inquired with Troupe Leader Liu, explained to mom, "It is possible to get married, but the marriage is not happy or long-lasting."

媽媽聽後不高興了，進屋來了。我爸和劉團長在外面說話。一會兒後，我爸來到了臥室，對媽媽說：“你怎麼就走了呢！”

媽媽回答：“他神叨叨的！現在誰還信這個。”

Mom got upset after hearing that and came inside. My dad and Troupe Leader Liu were talking outside. After a while, my dad came into the bedroom and said to mom, "Why did you just leave!"

Mom replied, "He's godly! Who believes that nowadays."

爸爸說：“人家都看出來了，你聽了就不高興了！還跟我說，他就是據術直言，按照古書上說的意思，怎麼想的，就怎麼說。那你也不能這樣啊！不信，聽聽也沒關係呀！你出來一起說話！”

Dad said, "People can see that, and you're not happy to hear it! He also told me that he was just speaking straight from his heart according to what the ancient books say, just directly speaking what he deemed truth. You shouldn’t be like that! If you don't believe, it's okay to just listen! You come out and talk together!"

媽媽跟着爸爸出去，一邊走一邊問：“又是啥事？”

在廚房裡，爸爸對媽媽說：“劉團長說，他家的大女兒劉健君是天命，天資聰明伶俐，但婚姻命也不好。大哥想把她許配給咱盧岩；說他們倆還挺般配的。把他倆綁成一對兒（注2），他們倆不好的婚姻命就都被破掉了。”

Mom followed Dad out, asking as she walked, "What is it again?"

In the kitchen, Dad said to Mom, "Troupe Leader Liu said that his eldest daughter, Eve Liu, is a sky fate (Goddess fate), gifted and smart, but also has a destined bad marriage life. He wants to betroth her to our Luyan; says the two are quite compatible. By tying them together as a pair (Annotation 2), both of their bad marriage destinies will be broken."

注1.2,插圖1-2是本書第18章《太陽石》中的創世界之神 “阿彌陀（納瓦特語Ometeotl）”；實際那是墨西哥的雨神特拉洛克（Tlaloc）和眾生之母翠玉女（Chalchiuhtlicue）。圖中二人腳踝上紅線表示他們倆是由舍利王（Huitzilopochtli，墨西哥之父）捆綁而成的夫妻。舍利王是怎麼綁的？答：這是一個需要三代人花費100年的大工程項目；下文的蒙眼睛是轉移到第三代人的第一步。

Annotation 1.2, Illustrations 1-2 are Ometeotl (in Nahuatl), the god of world creation, from Chapter 18 “The Sun Stone” of this book; in actuality, they are Tlaloc, the Mexican god of rain, and Chalchiuhtlicue, the mother of all living beings. The red thread around their ankles indicates that they are bound as husband and wife by Huitzilopochtli, the father of Mexico. How is the Huitzilopochtli tied? Answer: This is a big project that takes three generations to spend 100 years on; the blindfolding below is the first step in transferring it to the third generation.

媽媽回答：“你看他那模樣兒！他的閨女能長啥樣！”

爸爸說：“這事兒也就是說說，他家的條件不錯。再說，他長的不好看，他家的嫂子還可能好看呢！”

Mom replied, "Look at his appearance! What can his daughter look like!"

Dad said, "That's just saying, his family is well off. Besides, his appearance is not good, his wife might be pretty!"

媽媽說：“現在他家挺好過的。這社會，二十年後，誰知道還啥樣！”

爸爸說：“人家提出來的，拒絕不好。再說，這事兒就是說到這兒，將來倆孩子成不成的，是他們倆的事兒。現在，咱們不是給盧岩破命麼!”

Mom said, "His family is doing well now. In this society, twenty years later, who knows what will happen!"

Dad said, "It's not good to refuse someone's offer. Besides, this is just a saying, in the future, the two children will become a couple or not, is the matter of the two of them. Now, we are trying to break Luyan’s bad marriage fate!"

(3 蒙眼睛 Blindfolding)

稍後，爸爸和劉團長回到了廚房。劉團長說：“如果我說的對，這孩子一見到我，就會哭；不過，他只能見我這一次。”

A little later, Dad and Troupe Leader Liu returned to the kitchen. Troupe Leader Liu said, "If I'm right, the boy will cry as soon as he sees me; however, he can only see me this one time."

媽媽在後面，聽了之後就說：“還有那事兒！那咱試試！反正見一次也不礙事。”

他們小聲安排了隨後的實驗。劉團長又說：“那我就把他的眼睛蒙上了。”

Mom was in the back, and when she heard that, said, "There's that! Let's try it then! It won't hurt to see him once anyway."

They arranged the subsequent experiment in a whisper. Troupe Leader Liu added, “Then I'll blindfold him.”

爸爸和媽媽都表示不明白。

劉團長說：“哎呀！我才想起來，以後我不能讓他再看見我了！” 想了一會兒，又說：“沒關係！以後我再安排人，把眼蒙揭開。”

Dad and mom both said they didn't understand.

Troupe Leader Liu said, “Oops! I just remembered that I can't let him see me again in the future!” After thinking for a while, he added, “It's okay! I'll arrange for someone to uncover the blindfold later.”

媽媽不高興地說：“咋沒關係呢!”

爸爸笑着說：“咱們不明白，劉團長說沒關係，那就沒關係唄！”

Mom said unhappily, "Why it doesn't matter!"

Dad smiled and said, "We don't understand, but if Troupe Leader Liu said it doesn't matter, then it doesn't matter!"

當時，我坐在臥室的炕上；一個人進來了，直接走進了裡屋。很快，我就把這件事忘了。突然，他出來了，直接面對地走向我，面無血色和表情。我看得頭腦發炸，還沒反應過來呢。他飄回了屋地中央，又很快轉向廚房，出去了。嚇得我，拼命地向炕東南方向爬，嚎叫（注2）！

At that time, I was sitting on the bed in the bedroom; a man came in and walked straight into the inner room. Soon I forgot about it. Suddenly, he came out and walked directly toward me face to face, his face bloodless and expressionless. My mind exploded at the sight, before I could react. He floated back to the center of the house floor, and quickly turned toward the kitchen and out. Frightened, I crawled desperately toward the southeast of the bed, howling!

注1-2，這段描述了做肉眼通的第一步：他疾速走近我，我看着，感覺如同攝像鏡頭快速聚焦，頭像似爆炸了一樣。這驚嚇使我患了嬰幼兒神經發育失調症。此病症的一個症狀是視力障礙，古人就說把眼睛蒙住了。啟蒙的過程在2.8節。第3章詳細地討論了此 “肉眼通” 的作法。插圖1-3左源自古墨西哥，表示舍利王正在為教子講述肉眼通作法的第三步。插圖2是特拉洛克，筆者認為他的眼睛是古墨西哥人對肉眼通的眼睛 “不眩光” 特徵的描述，即不眩眼。圖3是中國三星堆出土的青銅面具，筆者認為那是把肉眼通的眼睛描述成了觸目驚心的 “觸目” ，即看見的人可能會有 “被接觸到了，被電擊了” 的感覺。

Annotation 1-2, this paragraph describes the first step of the “Flesh Eye Through”: He approached me quickly, and as I watched, I felt as if the camera lens were focusing quickly, and my head felt as if it were going to explode. The shock caused me to fall in “children neurodevelopmental disorder”. One symptom of this disorder is visual impairment, which the ancients said blindfolded the eyes. The process of Revelation is in section 2.8; chapter 3 discussed more about the process of making “Flesh Eye Through”. Illustrations 1-3, left, are of ancient Mexican origin and represent the third step of the Flesh Eye Through practice, which Huitzilopochtli is lecturing to his godson. Figure 2 shows Tlaloc, whose eyes, in author my own opinion, are the ancient Mexican description of "non-dazzle" feature of the eyes. Figure 3 is a bronze mask unearthed at Sanxingdui in China, in author my own opinion, that is a description of the eyes of the “Flesh-eyed Through” as “touching eyes”, i.e., the person who sees it may have the feeling of "being touched”, "being electrocuted".

廚房裡，媽媽驚訝地說：“哎呀! 真哭了 ！這咋辦！”

爸爸說：“說好了的，你進去安慰他！”

媽媽一邊往屋裡跑，一邊喊：“咋地啦？咋地啦？”

In the kitchen, mom was surprised and said: "Oops! Really crying! What to do!"

Dad said, "We agreed, you go in and comfort him!"

Mom ran into the house and shouted, "What's wrong? What's wrong?"

我爬到炕檐邊，抱着媽媽哭。爸爸也進來了。

媽媽氣憤地說：“嚇得！咱倆都不在，突然看見一個陌生人。你看！唉呀媽呀！頭髮都站立起來了！可把孩子嚇壞啦！”

I climbed to the edge of the bed and hugged mom, crying. Dad also came in.

Mom said angrily, "He was scared! We were both away and suddenly he saw a stranger. Look! Oh! My God! His hairs are standing on end! He scared the kid!"

爸爸說：“老劉大哥讓你問。”

媽媽問：“問啥呀？啊！咋地了？告訴媽，咋回事？”

我只是比畫，說不出話來了。

Dad said, " Troupe Leader Liu asked you to ask."

Mom asked, "What? Ah! What's wrong? Tell mom, what's going on?"

I just, “Woo, woo!” gesticulated and couldn't speak.

媽媽氣憤地嘟囔：“就是嚇得！這連話都不會說了! 摸摸毛，嚇不着！告訴媽，你看見啥啦？”

我回答：“人！嗚！嗚！”，用手比畫着。

媽媽對我說：“啊！一個人進來，然後又出去了。這事兒，我和你爸都知道，沒事兒！”

Mom muttered angrily, "Just scared! This can't even speak anymore!” Mom stroked my head, and continually said, “All right! Ok! Tell mom, what did you see?”

I replied, "Man! Woo! Woo!”, gesturing with my hands.

Mom said to me, "Ah! A man came in and then went out again. It's okay, your dad and I know about it!"

(4 婚約定了，Contract is sealed)

爸爸去了廚房，一會兒又回來了，對媽媽說：“劉團長出去了，讓咱倆再商量商量倆孩子的事。”

媽媽說：“就像你說的，這也不算個事呀，他要多少錢？”

Dad went to the kitchen, came back a while later, and said to mom, "Troupe Leader Liu went out and asked us to discuss the two children's affairs."

Mom said, "Like you said, it's not a big deal. How much does he want?"

爸爸說：“也沒說錢！不能要錢吧？”

媽媽說：“還是問清楚好。”

Dad said, “He didn't say anything about money! It isn’t about money, is it?”

Mom said, "It's better to ask."

他們仨人在廚房說話。劉團長說：“這親事就這麼定了！啥錢也不用。這事還關繫到我姑娘呢！也是我的事，由我來作法。”

爸爸問：“那我們該做什麼呀？”

The three of them were talking in the kitchen. Mr. Liu said, "Then the marriage is settled! There's no need for any money. This matter also concerns my girl! It's also my business, so I'll do the work."

Dad asked, "What should we do then?"

劉團長說：“以後我會告訴你。剛才在你們商量這事兒的時候，我在外邊做了點兒事。現在，他們的命已經破了一半兒了。其餘的作法，將來不在你們家裡做，會在外面的什麼地方。”

爸爸說：“小盧岩將來就能結婚了，真好！這事兒全靠大哥費心了！”

Liu said, "I'll tell you later. While you were discussing this matter, I did something outside. Now, half of their Fates have been broken. The rest of the “Making Laws” (western similar words: to do magic) will be done outside somewhere in the future, might not in your house."

Dad said, "It's great that little Luyan will be able to get married in the future! It's all thanks to big brother's trouble!

(5)

一些天后，爸爸剛下班回來，跟媽媽說話。我家的臥室開間大約是6.5米×3.3米；但是，我被白霧包圍着，看不見他們。媽媽說： “劉健君送給盧岩的！快讓盧岩看看！” 。

Some days later, my dad had just returned from work and was talking to my mom. The bedroom opening in my house is about 6.5 meters by 3.3 meters; however, I was surrounded by white fog and couldn't see them. Mom said: "Eve Liu gave it to Luyan! Quickly let Luyan see it!”.

當我爬到距離爸爸很近的時候，看見爸爸帶回來的兩個玩具：一個黃色塑料陀螺和一個紅色帶各色斑點的華麗棒。現在回憶起來，那時，我能看清0.5m遠，0.9m直徑大小的一個地方，周圍是白霧（注3，這是嬰幼兒神經發育失調的症狀）。我只能看清爸爸身寬的一半，看不見媽媽。現在估計，我和媽媽的距離不會超過1.4m遠。

When I crawled very close to my dad, saw the two toys he brought back: a yellow plastic gyro and a red ornate stick with spots of various colors. As I recall now, at that time, I could see a place 0.5m away and 0.9m in diameter, surrounded by white fog (Annotation 5, this is a symptom of children neurodevelopmental disorders). I could only see half the width of my dad's body, not my mom. It is now estimated that I can't be more than 1.4m away from mom.

媽媽對爸爸說：“看來，這孩子的眼睛有毛病了！趴到那麼近看！”

Mom said to Dad, "Looks like the kid has an eye problem! Getting down that close to see!"

(6)

又一天，我在臥室炕上坐着，爸爸笑嘻嘻地對媽媽說：“人家那誰，去瀋陽看見劉團長了。他家可好過了。我還特意問問他家的大丫頭。那才多大呀！到處跑，不怕陌生人，見人就主動搭訕，會背詩，唱歌，100以內的算術張口就來。”

Another day, I was sitting on the bed in our bedroom, and my father said to my mother with a smile, “The other guy, that who, went to Shenyang and saw the Troupe Leader Liu. His family is doing well. I even asked him about his big girl (i.e., Eve Liu). How old is she!? She runs around, is not afraid of strangers, talks to people when she sees them, recites poems, sings songs, and can-do arithmetic within 100.”

媽媽回答：“你還記着呢! 她上托兒所或者幼兒園吧！我聽說那地方，人家都教。那孩子長得啥樣？”

爸爸回答：“那我沒問。”

Mom replied, “You still remember! She goes to a daycare center or kindergarten! I've heard that's where people are taught. What does that kid look like?”

Dad replied, "That I didn't ask."

媽媽笑着說：“你瞞着我吧！” 轉頭對我說：“這麼點兒個小人兒，還有個媳婦兒在大城市。以後咱上學，也好好學習，比她學習好，咱還看不上她呢！咱可不攀那高枝兒！”

Mom laughed and said, “You hid it from me!" Turning to me, she said, "This little man, has a wife in the big city. In the future, after we go to school, we'll study hard and be better than her, we look down her! We're not going to climb up that high branch!”

爸爸說：“瞞你幹什麼！我沒辦法問。他只說那小丫頭，鬼精靈，一點也不怕生，前院後院到處跑。那麼個小孩子，誰還能說人家長得醜。”

Dad said, “Why don't you know? I couldn't ask. All he said was that the little girl was so smart, not afraid of strangers, and ran around the front and back yards. Such a little girl! Who can say she looks ugly!?”

媽媽進了裡屋，不說話了。當時，我還真的很想聽。媽媽發現了，對爸爸說：“小盧岩可能明白這事！一說劉健君，他瞪着眼睛，聚精會神地，聽得可認真了！”

Mom went into the back room and stopped talking. At that time, I really wanted to listen. Mom noticed and said to Dad, “Little Luyan probably understands this! As soon as we talked Eve Liu, he stared and concentrated, listening very carefully!"  

看來這時，我的視力恢復到接近正常了。

It seems that by this time, my eyesight had returned to near normal.

Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)