一个人在生活上的成功很大程度可以归功于仅仅这一个要素;直觉地,我们已经知道,成功和自我克制有很密切的关系。这是因为能自我克制显示一个人有坚强的意志。这个直觉实际上的确很有科学依据。最近发布的一个研究指出,一个儿童未来的健康,财富,犯罪率和成功,从小时候起就可以从他/她有无自我克制能力推测出来。这个结论来自一项由13名加拿大,美国,英国和新西兰科学家(包括心理学家,医学专家和遗传学家)联合进行的30 年的研究。研究的报告发表在 2011 年1 月的美国国家科学院文献月刊(Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences)。
is merely an intro to the article. It does not state that those 3 factors came from the referenced research.
2. I did not state that “self-control is the most important <b>contributor</b>”, only that it is a <b>factor</b> ( 因素) .
If you read on, you will also find that I said the relationship between success and self-control is CORRELATIVE (相互关联) and not necessarily CAUSATIVE (“因” “果” ).
3. And yes, you are quite right in suggesting that the 3 factors may be inter-related, even though “self-control” may be an inborn trait.
The research results only indicated the possible relationship between "success" and "self-control". It mentioned no word of(A) concentration and (B)parent'supress. I wonder how based on this research you come to the conclustion that self-control is the most important contributor to success compared to other two.
Also in common sense, surely these three factors are inter-related to each other. Without family influence/education, how would you expect a kid to develop and possess self-control ability? Also the ability of focusing, to me, is an essential element of self-control. How can you separete them in such categorical term?
By the way, I did not check the journal article. Maybe the three concepts have been defined in the article.
I recommend you read John Locke's "Some thoughts concerning education". He thought that self control was the most important character and the base of all virtue - "... And the great principle and foundation of all virtue and worth is placed in this, that a man is able to deny himself his own desires, cross his own inclinations, and purely follow what reason directs as best, though the appetite lean the other way. ..." The 30-year research just proved what John Locke suggested more than two centuries ago. If we can educate our child to be a person who always follows what reason directs as best, our education is the full form of success. It doesn't matter whether he/she will attend the Ivies or not. It doesn't matter whether he/she will be rich or not. It does matter whether he/she has "a sound mind in a sound body", which is "a short but full description of a happy state of this world." Please read John Locke's "Some thoughts concerning education" if you want to educate your child to be successful.
I believe people like Bill Gates and his likes acted on a whim or followed their guts and turned a blind eye on the potential negative impact of their action in case things don't work. If they weighed all the pros and cons, they might have ended up as another smart Harvard graduate working for Microsoft or Google as an employee. Of course, for every one success story of acting on a whim, another hundred probably have gotten nowhere (their stories don't get told because they can't sell). Personally, if my son tells me he is quitting college, wants to move back home and start his own business in my garage, I won't feel too happy about it and I am going to tell him to exercise his self-control instead of acting on a whim. I admire Bill Gates's parents but I don't think I would want to go through that kind of turmoil in my life.
Fangemin, I think you're getting away from the intended meaning of “self-control”. Self control simply means not acting impulsively and unthinkingly. So, in the scenario you described, after careful consideration, your son will decide what is right for him (quitting Harvard, declining Google's offer, or whatever). THAT, is indeed excellent self-control.
If your son is a "potential future Bill Gates", then all the more reason he should exercise self-control. Without self-control (which is to say, if he acts impulsively) he may NEVER become another Bill Gates.
I agree with you almost 100% on the importance of self-control. But when I think further (without your article, I would never have thought further about it), I started to see, or to put it more accurately,I started to lose sight of the fine line between self-control and suppression of one's desires or passions or indulgence. A major criticism of the Tiger Mom was she could only raise professors but not Bill Gates. The same criticism might be applied here on self-control. Too much self-control can mean that a kid would suppress his passion (or indulgence) for something and instead take a safer route.
For example, if your son decides to quit Harvard, ditch the job offer from Google, and start his own business because he has a hunch that he can be as successful as Bill Gates, do you think he has enough self-control? Or on the other hand, if he sets his mind on graduating from Harvard and taking the job offer from Google even though some people suggest he should quit school and start his own business, do you think he has too much self-control?
For most people, there is no doubt that they should instill self-control in their kids from day one. That is what I did with my kids. But for potential parents of Bill Gates, I am not too sure.
When does “self-control” become “suppression of one's creativity, etc.”?
I think the answer is that it does not, and it should not.
Within the context of this article, self-control means one should not act impulsively and rashly. In other words, it means that when one is about to embark on an act that may potentially have negative consequences, one should first pause and think twice before proceeding. If we are sure that no harm will result then by all means go ahead and do it. This type of self-control (or thoughtfulness)should not stifle creativity and inspiration.
What is relationship between self-control and suppression? Can self-control lead to suppression of one's creativity, aspiration and willingness to take on risks in order to succeed?
Allow me to offer a slightly different opinion. "self-control" is a quality that is somewhat hard to quantify. From a layman's point of view, it can also overlap with the concept of "attention focus". Such kind of data correlation study could be overly simplistic.