(老公那時因為在奧巴馬和希拉里中間搖擺不定，最後一度認為可以把手中的一票投給他，也有點受此影響)。 所以，在聽說他競選其間和聘用的專用攝影師傳出緋聞之後，我和很多他的支持者一樣，接受了他的解釋，“Its just a moment of weakness. Nothing serious"。 而身在旋渦中的伊麗沙白當時也是這樣輕信了她深愛的丈夫。當然，後來的事實證明，這件婚外情根本沒有那麼簡單 -愛得華和這個女人的關係在他向妻子保證不再和她來往之後仍然繼續了好幾個月；而且，愛得華很可能是這個女人十九個月前生下的孩子的父親！儘管他一再聲明這只是沒有根據的謠言，並願意接受DNA 測試來證明自己不是孩子的父親，但種種circumstances (比如他的競選主管先出來申明自己是那個孩子的父親，卻在幾個星期前否認這個說法)，都讓人懷疑他是否和以前一樣是在“不見棺材不落淚”。如果事實證明他真的有一個婚外的女兒，而且默許自己的手下非法使用競選經費來keep her quiet 的話，我真的會懷疑：“天下烏鴉一般黑”？！
(在得知此事後不久，她的癌症發現了轉移，醫生認為她最多只能再活十年)，伊麗沙白保持了她的尊嚴和風度。她從開始的自責，漸漸認識到，丈夫出軌，是他自己的軟弱和缺乏控制力，和自己沒有直接的關係。她在新書“Resilience" 中詳細描寫了自己在得知愛得華出軌事件之後的心路歷程。在接受奧普拉獨家採訪時，她這樣說： "I blame John, but also, women need to have more respect for other women。 It takes a lot of work to put together a marriage, to put together a family and a home. You have to have enough respect for other human beings to leave their lives alone. If you admire that life, build it for yourself. Dont just try to come in and take somebody elses life."
伊麗沙白坦承，她和愛得華之間長期建立起來的信任，現在已經土崩瓦解，需要很長時間去修復。她說，
"He can try to treat the wound, and he has tried. He can try to make me less afraid, and he has tried. But I am now a different person. The way we were is no longer the way we can be." 儘管如此，她還是選擇了原諒丈夫，因為她相信他仍然愛她，而發生在他和另外一個女人之間的事情，他自己都“無法解釋”。即便那個孩子最後被證明真的是他的孩子，她也認為自己可以接受，但是，這將是“something he has to deal with, not me". 當被問及她為什麼會作出這樣的決定時，她這樣回答： "Our family has been through a lot. Some caused by nature, some caused by human weakness, and some ━ most recently ━ caused by the desire for sensationalism and profit without any regard for the human consequences。 None of these has been easy. But we have stood with one another through them all. Although John believes he should stand alone and take the consequences of his action now, when the door closes behind him, he has his family waiting for him."
Thanks for your comments. I too think we should always be a student in life:). It's a never ending process. Didn't an old saying state that "the more you know, the more you know you don't know"?
As a true student of learning in life, I am so happy to see so many meaningful and intellectual discussions on issues, rather than some typical Chinese popular or American red-necked way of "jumping into" a conclusion. Yes, we all human beings tend to like enjoying the Devinely and socially bestowed "Rights," (whether natural or entitlement ones), but less like to assume the equally charged "Responsibilities" which also can be viewed by those who are inclined not to be bound as the "constraints" that would limit their "free will or obstacle" for their desire. :-)
"Your Student" (This name is kind of tricky, because when I use it toward you, I should say "my student", but that is not appropriate:))):
Thank you for your nice comments. I agree there are a "gang of bloggers" here and many of them are very talented and passionate. I'm hornored to say that a few of them are my personal friends and I know some of them have other bloggs at Sina or other sites that can be accessible in China. Even Wanwei can be accessed in China with proxy server (my cousin actually reads my blog from China; I gave the server address to a friend who used to be a blogger here and now went back to China, and he can read our articles with it too). She actually writes something in her own QQ blog and credited me for her "changed attitude and behavior toward" her 8 year old boy, so I feel very encouraged:).
Thanks again for your visit and encouragement. I'll do my best:)).
"Your Student" (This name is kind of tricky, because when I use it toward you, I should say "my student", but that is not appropriate:))):
Thank you for your nice comments. I agree there are a "gang of bloggers" here and many of them are very talented and passionate. I'm hornored to say that a few of them are my personal friends and I know some of them have other bloggs at Sina or other sites that can be accessible in China. Even Wanwei can be accessed in China with proxy server (my cousin actually reads my blog from China; I gave the server address to a friend who used to be a blogger here and now went back to China, and he can read our articles with it too). She actually writes something in her own QQ blog and credited me for her "changed attitude and behavior toward" her 8 year old boy, so I feel very encouraged:).
Thanks again for your visit and encouragement. I'll do my best:)).
A good piece with a well balanced brain in numerous fronts. I sense there is a talented "gang of N bloggers" here. Why you people who know one another can work as a team, and bring your work collectively into China? It would help with your due impact to purify the ill-willed maintream mentality there. This website is not accessible in China.
What's generation gap? This is generation gap! Those shows you mentioned, I have only seen "Titanic" and "Pretty Woman". Have heard about the other ones, but not seen them, but based on the storylines, I know they are not my type anyways/
As for the "perfect mate", it's really a perception. You never know if someone is "perfect" for you, especially if he's the only one you have been with. But that doesn't mean you don't treasure what you have built together. Life is too short, if you find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, that's the "perfect mate" for me:). Simple enough.
