(老公那时因为在奥巴马和希拉里中间摇摆不定，最后一度认为可以把手中的一票投给他，也有点受此影响)。 所以，在听说他竞选其间和聘用的专用摄影师传出绯闻之后，我和很多他的支持者一样，接受了他的解释，“Its just a moment of weakness. Nothing serious"。 而身在旋涡中的伊丽沙白当时也是这样轻信了她深爱的丈夫。当然，后来的事实证明，这件婚外情根本没有那么简单 -爱得华和这个女人的关系在他向妻子保证不再和她来往之后仍然继续了好几个月；而且，爱得华很可能是这个女人十九个月前生下的孩子的父亲！尽管他一再声明这只是没有根据的谣言，并愿意接受DNA 测试来证明自己不是孩子的父亲，但种种circumstances (比如他的竞选主管先出来申明自己是那个孩子的父亲，却在几个星期前否认这个说法)，都让人怀疑他是否和以前一样是在“不见棺材不落泪”。如果事实证明他真的有一个婚外的女儿，而且默许自己的手下非法使用竞选经费来keep her quiet 的话，我真的会怀疑：“天下乌鸦一般黑”？！
(在得知此事后不久，她的癌症发现了转移，医生认为她最多只能再活十年)，伊丽沙白保持了她的尊严和风度。她从开始的自责，渐渐认识到，丈夫出轨，是他自己的软弱和缺乏控制力，和自己没有直接的关系。她在新书“Resilience" 中详细描写了自己在得知爱得华出轨事件之后的心路历程。在接受奥普拉独家采访时，她这样说： "I blame John, but also, women need to have more respect for other women。 It takes a lot of work to put together a marriage, to put together a family and a home. You have to have enough respect for other human beings to leave their lives alone. If you admire that life, build it for yourself. Dont just try to come in and take somebody elses life."
伊丽沙白坦承，她和爱得华之间长期建立起来的信任，现在已经土崩瓦解，需要很长时间去修复。她说，
"He can try to treat the wound, and he has tried. He can try to make me less afraid, and he has tried. But I am now a different person. The way we were is no longer the way we can be." 尽管如此，她还是选择了原谅丈夫，因为她相信他仍然爱她，而发生在他和另外一个女人之间的事情，他自己都“无法解释”。即便那个孩子最后被证明真的是他的孩子，她也认为自己可以接受，但是，这将是“something he has to deal with, not me". 当被问及她为什么会作出这样的决定时，她这样回答： "Our family has been through a lot. Some caused by nature, some caused by human weakness, and some ━ most recently ━ caused by the desire for sensationalism and profit without any regard for the human consequences。 None of these has been easy. But we have stood with one another through them all. Although John believes he should stand alone and take the consequences of his action now, when the door closes behind him, he has his family waiting for him."
Thanks for your comments. I too think we should always be a student in life:). It's a never ending process. Didn't an old saying state that "the more you know, the more you know you don't know"?
As a true student of learning in life, I am so happy to see so many meaningful and intellectual discussions on issues, rather than some typical Chinese popular or American red-necked way of "jumping into" a conclusion. Yes, we all human beings tend to like enjoying the Devinely and socially bestowed "Rights," (whether natural or entitlement ones), but less like to assume the equally charged "Responsibilities" which also can be viewed by those who are inclined not to be bound as the "constraints" that would limit their "free will or obstacle" for their desire. :-)
"Your Student" (This name is kind of tricky, because when I use it toward you, I should say "my student", but that is not appropriate:))):
Thank you for your nice comments. I agree there are a "gang of bloggers" here and many of them are very talented and passionate. I'm hornored to say that a few of them are my personal friends and I know some of them have other bloggs at Sina or other sites that can be accessible in China. Even Wanwei can be accessed in China with proxy server (my cousin actually reads my blog from China; I gave the server address to a friend who used to be a blogger here and now went back to China, and he can read our articles with it too). She actually writes something in her own QQ blog and credited me for her "changed attitude and behavior toward" her 8 year old boy, so I feel very encouraged:).
Thanks again for your visit and encouragement. I'll do my best:)).
"Your Student" (This name is kind of tricky, because when I use it toward you, I should say "my student", but that is not appropriate:))):
Thank you for your nice comments. I agree there are a "gang of bloggers" here and many of them are very talented and passionate. I'm hornored to say that a few of them are my personal friends and I know some of them have other bloggs at Sina or other sites that can be accessible in China. Even Wanwei can be accessed in China with proxy server (my cousin actually reads my blog from China; I gave the server address to a friend who used to be a blogger here and now went back to China, and he can read our articles with it too). She actually writes something in her own QQ blog and credited me for her "changed attitude and behavior toward" her 8 year old boy, so I feel very encouraged:).
Thanks again for your visit and encouragement. I'll do my best:)).
A good piece with a well balanced brain in numerous fronts. I sense there is a talented "gang of N bloggers" here. Why you people who know one another can work as a team, and bring your work collectively into China? It would help with your due impact to purify the ill-willed maintream mentality there. This website is not accessible in China.
What's generation gap? This is generation gap! Those shows you mentioned, I have only seen "Titanic" and "Pretty Woman". Have heard about the other ones, but not seen them, but based on the storylines, I know they are not my type anyways/
As for the "perfect mate", it's really a perception. You never know if someone is "perfect" for you, especially if he's the only one you have been with. But that doesn't mean you don't treasure what you have built together. Life is too short, if you find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, that's the "perfect mate" for me:). Simple enough.
